Overwhelmed

Morning Coffee and planning my words

I think the underlying feeling I have had over the past year has been overwhelmed. I have been overwhelmed with guilt, exhaustion, grief, tiredness, sadness. As a result, I have all but shut down. 

As I started to dig my way out from all the negative and refocus, something new would bring me back down.

Moving onto my blank slate of 2021, I have a few tools I will use to get past this. Because, to be honest, most of what happened in the past year is still happening now.

So here is my plan to get back to feeling more like me: Continue reading “Overwhelmed”

The Daily Edit

Pencils in Orange Mug - Editing Tools

Journalists who wrote for newspapers knew everything about the daily edit. They submitted their articles, went to an editor, and made changes, deletions, and corrections. It was a daily edit of their work. 

In school, our teachers had us write drafts of papers. We turned them in; she/he used a red pen and marked them up. Spelling errors, grammatical errors, ideas that needed to be expanded upon or removed entirely were all marked in red. Sometimes, it was a complete restart from one draft to the next. (Just me??) Continue reading “The Daily Edit”

Creating Space

Old Swim Coat Filled with patches

There is something invigorating about creating space. The calendar’s flip to a new year creates all sorts of space or the illusion of it. Pulling down the Christmas decorations creates new space in our homes.

This new space fills our soul with a sense of optimism. Or maybe a need to refill the space with something new.

I find I am more creative when the slate is clean. My desk is cleared off—the areas within my eye-sight with nothing out of order.

Maybe this is why I hadn’t been creating recently. My outer and inner spaces were filled with stuff. Continue reading “Creating Space”

Hitting the Reset Button

Alarm Clock

I have had a hard time hitting the reset button. It is easy in so many ways to stop a downward spiral; you just need to stop and restart. Hit the reset button, so to speak.

Yet, December, or maybe most of 2020, has been a bit of a wash. I mean, the year started out well. There was a bit traction in my business. I met with artists, had positive responses to emails, had conferences scheduled, and then everything was canceled. Continue reading “Hitting the Reset Button”

The Undone

The Undone List

My list of all of the undone stuff is overwhelming. And what is worse, most of the undone tasks don’t even make it to the to-do list anymore!

It’s strange how there always seems to be something I just don’t want to do. It may be something I perceive to be hard; it may be something unpleasant. But mostly, it is just stuff I am procrastinating doing. Continue reading “The Undone”

Baby Steps

Baby Steps

Learning to take baby steps is hard.  Sometimes it takes everything I have to just move forward. Only one little step forward. Some days I blast through my to-do list and think I should have put more on it. Today, I failed to write a list until after lunch.

Looking at my to-do list and everything I should put on my list, which I know I don’t have the time to even think about, is overwhelming. It is hard to know where to start and to be truthfully, sometimes I don’t start. Continue reading “Baby Steps”

Missing Out

Boy on Dock

FOMO or the fear of missing out has taken over the country. I have no other explanation for why it appears; otherwise, rational people would lose their shit. And to be honest, I fully include myself in this!

I always thought I wouldn’t fall into this trap. I love Instagram, but I don’t have this oh my gosh, their lives are so much better than mine thing when I am on it. I genuinely love looking at well-shot pictures, pictures of amazing places on earth, photos of great food, and fun!

It isn’t that my life is fantastic, it is just that I was, I guess, content where things were. I have a decent life: a mom, entrepreneur, daughter, sister, friend, no complaints.

And then the pandemic hit our country, and everything stopped. Everything stopped, but the fear of myself or someone I love getting Covid-19. I learned everything I could about this disease. We eased into our new lives of hanging out at home, getting groceries delivered, and staring at each other’s faces. Continue reading “Missing Out”

Back to Showing Up

Wrist Watch

It seems so simple, show up. Show up for work, your family, your friends, yourself. Yet, I have had a hard time showing up and doing what I need to be doing.

I could blame this on a whole bunch of different reasons. Of course, the ongoing pandemic has caused many to lose their jobs. Schools closed down for the remainder of the school year. My husband’s work shut down for six weeks, so he was around the house. My daughter’s car accident caused her to go on disability for six weeks. 

So, many excuses, yet none of them should have derailed me.

I have never been someone to allow excuses to rule my life.

Continue reading “Back to Showing Up”

The Pause ends in July

Flip Flops at Bottom of Sand Dune

And just like that, it is July.

Reflecting on the first half of the year is hard. At the beginning of 2020, there were goals to be achieved. Days were lived with purpose. Each day I was moving forward on my business plans. To-do lists were written, and daily tasks crossed out.

To be honest, of course, there were days when I rewrote the previous day’s to-do list. Not every day went the way you thought it might, but generally, things were moving in a specific direction.

And then rumors of a virus hit the news. The stories became facts, and life came to a halt. Continue reading “The Pause ends in July”

New Routines

Alarm Clock

New year, new routines?  Or am I still trying to find one which works well for me.

Having been on the road much of the end of 2019, waking up to a home which wasn’t mine, I found it hard to be grounded in routine.  What exactly should I be doing and when?  What was the number one thing I should get done today?

With the lack of routine and no looming deadlines, I found it hard to be as productive as I would like.  Or near as productive as I was when I was working full-time.  Which makes no sense to me. Continue reading “New Routines”